


Two shots of Whiskey and a Chaser of... Karaoke

by kachera



Category: Angel: the Series, Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-31
Updated: 2011-03-31
Packaged: 2017-10-17 10:23:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/175844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kachera/pseuds/kachera
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So a vampire hunter and a vampire walk into a demon bar...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Two shots of Whiskey and a Chaser of... Karaoke

**Story Title** : Two shots of Whiskey and a Chaser of... Karaoke  
 **Character/Relationships** : Damon, Alaric, Lorne (aka The Host)  
 **Rating** : PG  
 **Warnings** : None  
 **Word Count** : ~1300  
 **Fandom crossover** : The Vampire Diaries (set a year or two in the future), Angel (set sometime in Season 2)  


So a vampire hunter and a vampire walk into a demon bar. My bar. Wait – tell me if you've heard this one before.

It's a slow afternoon with just a couple of regulars tucked into booths, so I notice as they come through the door. I recognize them because in the demon world any vampire that pairs up with the humans tends to generate a little gossip. I'm surprised to see them here, as LA's not exactly part of their usual stomping grounds, but then again Caritas has a way of drawing folks in.

It only takes a glance at their auras to see that tonight the sanctuary aspect of my bar is likely just as important as the alcohol. Damon is practically crackling with frustration and Alaric feels like the last of his patience was used up five miles back.

They head straight for the bar, neither one looking at the other. After a clipped exchange of words with the bartender, both men down their first tumbler of bourbon, and are starting in on a second. That's when the proverbial last straw falls. As Damon turns in his seat, his elbow knocks Alaric's arm and sloshes the drink into his lap. Alaric pulls his fist back to take a swing at Damon, but I've never been one to miss my cue and I'm moving to the bar in a heartbeat.

"Boys! Welcome to Caritas – your _violence free_ neighborhood bar." My appearance has the expected result. Alaric freezes with his fist still in the air, likely shocked by my outrageously fabulous purple suit I’m sure, while Damon narrows his eyes before angling his body slightly, ready to vent his anger by tearing into little ol' me.

Time to dial down the aggression and introduce a little zen. I raise my hands palms out.

"Easy there sweet cheeks. This is my bar, and it's set up as a safe haven. And to you Mr. Tall, Rugged, and Handsome, no need to worry. Not everyone can pull off a look like mine, but aren’t we all just brothers under the skin?"

Damon takes a second to look me over before I see him relax the slightest bit, and behind him Alaric picks up on his reaction.

"What the hell is this one, and how do we take it out?" Alaric's whispered question is barely louder than a breath, but my hearing is almost as good as any vampire’s.

"Take me out? Honey, we've just met! Now while I do enjoy flowers and a night at the theater, I get the feeling you weren't talking about a date." My reply has both men frowning, which is a step up from outright violence, so I continue.

"As I was saying, this is my bar and tonight your drinks will be on me.” I pause to consider the options. “Since if looks like you both need more than just bourbon, Mr. Salvatore I recommend the AB-negative if you're feeling peckish, and for you Mr. Saltzman – have you ever tried a Bird of Paradise? You can almost taste the tropics." I signal to the bartender, but he's already heard and is pulling the drinks together including my customary Sea Breeze. I make a mental note to give him a raise.

Damon's on his feet in a blur of motion. "Who _are_ you, and how the _hell_ do you know who we are?"

I'm a little disappointed - apparently my reputation hasn't spread quite as far as I'd imagined. "I'm the Host of Caritas, and as for how I know you two, I'm pretty well plugged into the demon underground newsfeed. Your hijinx over the last couple of years has gotten you more than a little press, which I've followed. But enough about that!” I put on my best friendly counselor smile. “This bar is my little oasis for folks of all kinds who need to kick back, or maybe sing a little tune and get a little guidance. I'm just thrilled you chose to drop in."

At that Alaric speaks up, voice just gravelly enough to be interesting. "There's a demon underground newsfeed?" He's beginning to look more curious than murderous, and Damon has settled back onto his heels, so I give them both a sly grin.

"Of course! It's not quite as reliable as TMZ, but demons like to keep up on their celebrity gossip too." The drinks arrive at that point and I pull up a chair and wave my hands at them. "Now settle in and take a load off. I won't get karaoke going for another couple hours so I'm at your disposal."

The boys loosen up after a few more drinks, and the conversation shifts from simply sharing information - I was frankly surprised at how much they didn’t know - to telling embarrassing stories. Pleased to have coxed them into a better mood, I finally leave when the evening crowd starts arriving.

Getting the show started keeps me occupied for a while, but I do make an effort to eavesdrop from a distance now and then. After the first hour of singing, both men have taken off their jackets and are leaning sideways into each other’s space, elbows braced on the bar behind them, watching the crowd. Damon says something I don’t catch and bumps Alaric’s leg with his own. In response Alaric turns to look at him, a look of disbelief on his face. After a moment he narrows his eyes and smirks before reaching over to grab a song list book. The look of horror on Damon’s face is priceless.

I lose track of them for a while after that as I’m pulled into reading the next singer who’s crooning a very passable rendition of Sinatra’s “My Way”. The crowd is receptive, and the mood generally good which always makes my night easier. When I look back over, Damon and Alaric have collected several more glasses, and Damon is talking animatedly with his hands. Alaric has turned in his seat to face him, their legs pressing together, trying unsuccessfully to stifle his laughter at whatever story is being told. Glad to see them really relaxing, I turn my attention back to the other patrons.

I'm just wrapping up my advice for an Ano-Movic demon after his heartfelt version of 'Billy Jean', when I hear the opening for Journey's 'Don’t Stop Believing' and glance up to see who’s taken the stage.

"Just a small town girl, livin' in a lonely world…" Damon and Alaric are sharing the microphone, leaning together, arms across each other's shoulders. They don't know all the words, but they easily make up for that with their flare for over emoting, and soon everyone's singing along with the chorus. They wrap it up, Damon taking an exaggerated bow while Alaric pumps his fist into the air in true hair band style, before pushing each other off the stage and back to their seats.

"Color me surprised! Kudos for getting up there, mi amigos.” I toast them with my drink before getting down to business. “Now as precognition is sorta my thing, here's what I got for you. First, you've got a lot of darkness on the road you're heading down, but you're better off together than apart so don’t screw that up. Second, the answer to the question neither one of you has asked is ‘Yes’. So go for it already."

They both look a little shocked, but I've seen that before and wave it off. "Enjoy your night, and make sure to stop by next time you're in town." I turn my back on them and head for the sound board to line up my next number, when I find myself still humming 'Don’t Stop Believing'. Yeah, it’s going to be a good night all round.  


**Author's Note:**

>  **Note 2** : Kudos to [](http://alittleblue.livejournal.com/profile)[**alittleblue**](http://alittleblue.livejournal.com/) for the beta and for sharing the Lorne love!


End file.
